


Cuffed Jeans and Finger Guns

by QueenBoudicatheGreat



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Coming Out, Evan's inability to drive, Gen, Harmless stereotypes, Humor, This is just a joke, just in case you don't like that, step-brothers au, use of the word queer, you know the one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-05-04 04:16:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14584758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenBoudicatheGreat/pseuds/QueenBoudicatheGreat
Summary: Michael figures out that Evan is bi.





	Cuffed Jeans and Finger Guns

**Author's Note:**

> I swear I don't mean this to be offensive, okay? I'm just a simple lesbian trying to live my life. I just saw a Tweet that said "If you can't drive, can't do math, and cuff your Jean's then you're probably bi" and my first thought was Jeremy. My second thought was "Oh shit and also Evan. Damn these boys are Very Similar." Anyway, have fun.

“Hey, uh, Michael? I really hate to ask you this, but, um, doyouthinkyoucouldgivemearide?”

 

Michael looked up from the game he and Jeremy had been playing to look at his best friend’s brand new step-brother standing in the door looking incredibly uncomfortable and finger gunning. Evan Hansen was a lot like Jeremy on the surface, a fact Michael made sure to point out almost immediately, but for some reason it was standing out in sharp relief today. Everything from the nervous posture to the awkward finger guns to the striped shirt and cuffed jeans. A sudden thought dawned on Michael. 

 

“Sure, no problem, dude. If you don't mind me asking, is it because you can't drive or because there's no car?” he asked with the warmest smile he could manage. Jeremy paused the game and furrowed his brow at him. 

 

Evan flushed darkly. “Uh, both, technically? I mean, my mom is about to leave so there won't be a car, but I wouldn't be able to drive it anyway.”

 

“Coolcoolcool,” Michael muttered, nodding to himself. “Random question: are you any good at math?”

 

Now Evan’s face was also crumpled in confusion. “Uh, no, it's not really my thing. I prefer science. I'm pretty sure Jared got an A in pre-cal last year, though, if you need a tutor? I'd ask Alana, but she's always super busy.” 

 

“Dude, I didn't know you were bisexual!” Michael grinned, absolutely delighted. 

 

The room fell into chaos. Well, considering there were only two more people, that was a bit of an exaggeration, but Michael was gay after all. Jeremy did sputter unintelligibly and fall off his beanbag while Evan turned bright red and let out a long wheezing “What?”

 

“Dude, what the actual hell?” Jeremy eventually asked after righting himself. 

 

“Look at him!” Michael protested. “He totally pinged my gaydar, but I didn't know what flavor of queer he was until now. He's obviously bi now that I know.”

 

“What are you talking about?” Jeremy scoffed. Evan was still bright red and silent but also very clearly wanted this question answered. 

 

Michael rolled his eyes. How dare Jeremy question him on this? He was never wrong. “Okay, fine. Cuffed jeans, can’t drive, can’t do math, but most importantly finger guns,” he rattled off, ticking them on his fingers. “Need I go on?”

 

Jeremy winced and looked Evan over with an almost resigned expression. “Sorry dude, but he's got you pegged. He did the same thing to me too,” he said apologetically. 

 

Evan was quiet for another moment and Michael was sure they had broken him, until he heard the tiniest little squeak of a voice he'd ever heard. “Please don't tell mom?”

 

“Dude, no, of course not!” Jeremy swore without hesitation. He got up to go clap a comforting hand on his step-brother’s shoulder. “You know she wouldn't have a problem with it though, right?” 

 

“Yeah, I know,” Evan muttered, staring at his shoes. “I just? I never had the time to tell her? And it never came up in conversation, so I don't really know how to come out.”

 

“I'll show you. I'm pretty sure I haven't actually come out to her yet. She's still here, yeah?” At Evan's nod, he grinned. He sauntered out the door and hung himself over the bannister on the landing. He sucked in a deep breath and shouted, “Hey, Heidi!”

 

“Yes, Jeremy?” she yelled back. 

 

“I'm totally bisexual!”

 

“That's great, dear! Thank you for telling me!”

 

Michael snickered and grinned. This game looked like too much fun to miss out on. He quickly found himself at Jeremy's side. “And I'm really super gay!”

 

“I know, Michael!” Michael flushed lightly at the memory of introducing himself with “Hi, Ms Hansen, I'm Jeremy's friend gay- I mean, Michael.” 

 

The two returned to the room, snickering and slightly leaning on each other. “See dude? Super easy,” Jeremy beamed. 

 

Evan looked about ready to melt into the floor, but still managed to look at least mildly unamused at their antics. “Yeah, no, Jeremy, obviously not. I'm not coming out to my mom by yelling it down the stairs.”

 

“Your loss,” Jeremy shrugged. 

 

“Honestly it's kinda therapeutic to yell about being gay at the top of your lungs,” Michael agreed. 

 

“So, where did you need to go anyways?” Jeremy asked, cutting the conversation short.

 

“Oh! Um, the movie theater? Jared and I were going to meet up with a couple other friends and go see the new Marvel movie.”

 

“No spoilers, but that movie is fantastic, you're gonna love it!” Jeremy said confidently. Evan just let out a couple weak laughs and smiled bashfully. 

 

“Hey, there's a Sev Elev on that corner, too!” Michael remembered. He turned to Jeremy with a knowing smirk. “You thinking what I'm thinking?”

 

“If you're thinking about a snack and slushie run, then obviously,” Jeremy scoffed. “Then again, when aren't you thinking about slushie runs?”

 

Michael shrugged. Had him there. He turned back to Evan and his tone was teasing. “I'll buy you a slushie if you promise to come out to your mom soon.”

 

Evan rolled his eyes, but there was a little smile playing at the corners of his mouth. “Okay, fine, I promise.”

 

“Awesome. Come on, Jer-bear, time to hit the road! We've gotta get Ev a slush and still get him to his movie on time.”

 

Jeremy did as he was told, and after wishing Heidi goodbye they were on their way out the door. Michael paused when he saw Evan hesitate before shutting the door. He was about to ask what was up when the blonde took a deep breath and shouted loud enough for all the neighbors to hear, “Mom, I'm bisexual! Okay, I love you! See you tonight!” Then he slammed the door and bolted to Michael's PT Cruiser where he threw himself in the back seat and hid his face in his arms while Jeremy wheezed in shotgun. 

 

“Evan, you absolute legend,” Michael howled, starting the car and pulling out if the drive. 

 

Jeremy twisted around in his seat to offer Evan a blinding smile and a fist bump. “That was awesome, dude.”

 

Evan bit his lip around a grin and shyly tapped his knuckles to Jeremy's. “It was kind of fun.”

 

“Hell yeah it was!” Michael shouted. “You're getting the biggest slushie that gas station has to offer!”

 

Evan laughed, and it was a bright bell-like sound that Michael realized he'd never heard before. He glanced up in the rearview mirror to see Evan with his eyes closed, humming through an easy smile, and for the first time ever in Michael's memory looking perfectly content. 

**Author's Note:**

> Gonna be perfectly honest, I doubt I'll write anything for BMC or DEH ever again. This was fun and silly, but I don't have any real ideas. Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
